The Fit Girl's Kitchen

This week the theme I have been working with in my yoga classes is kindness. Being kind to one another, and also being kind to YOURSELF.

This goes along with one of the five yamas, Ahimsa. In sanskrit, Ahimsa translates to "non-violence"; non-harm to others - in other words, universal love.
Practicing ahimsa goes beyond just acts of kindness - it also asks us to maintain kindness in our thoughts. Yoga Journal has a nice description of this:

"To practice ahimsa is to be constantly vigilant, to observe ourselves in interaction with others and to notice our thoughts and intentions. Try practicing ahimsa by observing your thoughts when a smoker sits next to you. Your thoughts may be just as damaging to you as his cigarette is to him."

Being kind to yourself in words and thoughts is just as important as being kind to others.

Being Kind to Yourself

So often we are hard on ourselves - beating ourselves up in thought for not doing something or wishing we had acted in a different way. But all of the living in the past just keeps us there - and does not allow us to progress, grow and change.

As a perfectionist, I can be SO hard on myself sometimes. But when we stop and reflect, maybe it's just the universe looking out for us...

Last night I was heading out to an event, backing out of my SUPER narrow driveway, which I am terrible at. I had to pull forward and straighten out twice and in my head I was going, Ugh you suck. How are you so bad at this? How have you not figured this out by now?



I pulled out, came to the first intersection in our neighborhood which has a two way stop, and a car BLEW through his stop sign and went through my street. I laid on my horn and thought, Oh My God...if I would have been there 5 seconds earlier, he would have completely smashed into my car.

But I wasn't. Because I am so terrible at backing out of my driveway.

Being Kind to Others

One of my favorite quotes here when remembering to treat others with kindness in words is this..."Before you open your mouth, ask yourself: Is it kind, is it necessary, is it true?"



I find this goes a long way in sharing potentially hurtful words with others. Practicing ahimsa also means we attempt to stop the harm being caused by others. Being neutral or participating as a standby observer is just as bad as participating in the event itself - this just encourages the harmful behavior to continue.

Kindness comes in actions but also in our thoughts ABOUT others. Referring to the quote earlier - your thoughts become your actions. Even though you may not say out loud what you are thinking, your actions and your energy will speak otherwise.

It can be a difficult practice to ALWAYS think kind thoughts - but I also like this quote for times when you just think, I CANNOT reason with this person:


You don't know that person's full story, what they went through that day, that week, that year. Kindness speaks volumes and will be returned to you tenfold.

Practice Kindness

Two ways to practice kindness the rest of this week and weekend:

• Compliment or go out of your way to help three strangers. See how you feel.
• Remove the word "should" from your vocabulary. See how this shifts your perspective in being kind to yourself

Follow me on Bloglovin!

The theme for the second week of FGK Mindful May is asteya (pronounced ahs-TAY-yah) which is sanskrit for non-stealing. Asteya is one of the five yamas (or yoga ethic principles) that are basically guidelines for ways to live life mindfully off the mat.

These 10 rules or ethical guidelines that make up the yamas and niyamas are not far off from another set of ten rules that many of us may be familiar with, however I really liked the newer interpretation I found with them at teacher training.

For example: non-stealing. We all get it, don't take things that aren't yours. We know right from wrong. But what if we applied this in the concept of stealing something less physical, like stealing time or resources...

Stealing of Time

One way we can interpret asteya is in the stealing of time; stealing time away from others, and also ourselves.

We steal time from others when we are late, we steal time when we interrupt, and we steal time when we are distracted and not present when in the company of our family and friends. A great example of this is being on your phone while having a conversation with someone else.

Time is a very valuable thing - texting, checking facebook and email while at the dinner table or just spending time in the company of friends isn't just rude - its actually a form of stealing.



I found a nice description of this on the Lululemon blog:


When we are on our phones constantly in the presence of others, we are demonstrating that we believe our time and needs are more important than theirs. This can really impact our friendships and especially our relationships.

Finding Contentment with What We Have

When we constantly focus on comparing ourselves to others and create judgements about what we don't have, this can lead to manifestation of desires (in a negative way). It is 100% ok and awesome to have goals and draw inspiration from others. But when we start coveting or thinking that we are not enough because we do not have enough, that is where things turn sour.



These thoughts or feelings can begin to express themselves as jealousy and can project some serious negative vibes onto others. It also drives this fear of inadequacy, that we don't have the right car or clothes or house - and then we overcompensate to make us feel "whole."

But think about it - have you REALLY ever not had enough of something? Food, clothing, heat, water, love, air? Most of us have an abundance in our lives that we never really appreciate. The sutras teach that when we learn to practice this concept of non-stealing, we realize that everything we need will come to us naturally, and has always come to us naturally. The universe will provide, so to speak.



The Yoga Sutra of Pantanjali teaches us that “to one established in Asteya, all wealth comes.” So, the more we find contentment in what we have, the less we begin to feel these thoughts of fear, desire and jealousy. We begin to feel less of a need to steal from others, from ourselves and from the earth. And we become more wealthy than we ever thought imaginable, naturally.

How to Practice Asteya

The easiest way to begin for me was with the concept of stealing time. So this week, I encourage you to be mindful of how you steal time from others.

• Respect people's time by not being late
• Be mindful of how often you ask others for help. Is this something you could do yourself, or do you really need assistance?
• Try not to interrupt someone's story just to share your ideas. Be a good listener - let them speak!
• PUT AWAY your phone at the dinner table. Please. Or play this game:

The Phone Challenge

I started doing this several weeks ago for another reason entirely, but I have stopped bringing my phone or iPad into my bedroom at night when I sleep. This was very difficult at first, but has made a HUGE difference in my sleep and the time I get to spend with my husband in the morning and at night.

This week, I challenge you to leave your phone out of your bedroom - charge it in another room or on another floor if you can. See what a difference this makes in your energy, your mood and your relationships in the next few days.

It will also make next week's challenge a little easier ;) Enjoy your week, and continue practicing your attitude of gratitude.

Much love,
Follow me on Bloglovin!

For our first week of the FGK Mindful May challenge, we are focusing on gratitude.

I chose gratitude first in this series because it is one of the easiest and most accessible approaches to living mindfully. Most of our days are comprised of routine - we get sucked into our day to day responsibilities, errands, requirements and it becomes easy to lose our connection to ourselves.

We can see this when we become frustrated at that person in line in front of us at the store, snap at someone who cuts us off in traffic, or lash out at a loved one for no reason. We think, ugh, that's not me. I am not a hateful person...why did I lose my cool?

We also see this in comparing our lives to others - wanting what they have, feeling that we are not good enough. This is our ego driving us, and not our true self.

So how does gratitude play a role here?

Actions and Reactions

One of the best ways to begin cultivating a connection to our true selves is to be mindful in our interactions with others. We can do this by beginning to shift our perspective when faced with situations where we would normally react in a negative way. The easiest way to do this is through gratitude.

What do I mean by this?

Let's take the grocery store scenario. It's late in the day, you are in line and at the store waiting to pay for your food, just wanting to GET HOME. The person in front of you is taking forever - you totally picked the wrong line.

Stop. Pause. Take a deep breath - and think of three things to be thankful for about situation, ie...

- I am thankful I have a job that gives me enough money to afford these groceries tonight
- I appreciate the person who is working behind the counter serving me (and the person taking forever). They probably want to be home with their family right now too, but they will most likely be here late into the night.
- I am grateful for a few extra minutes alone with myself to reflect


Now, notice the change in your body, physically. You probably feel calmer. You may even be smiling. Go ahead and send some love out to the person in front of you, a wish that their day gets better too.

Attitude shift. Just by saying thanks.

Role of Ego

Gratitude can also be helpful when we allow our insecurities to drive us. This is the ego speaking from a place of fear - telling us we are not good enough. Thinking we need more to make us feel better. We "should' feel guilty/ashamed/bad about doing or not doing something.


Let's take this scenario which I discussed with a friend of mine recently... She was struggling with eating well (she eats very well), body image and being hard on herself. She asked what to do when someone brought cupcakes into work - "I want to eat one, but then I feel guilty enjoying it. I don't deserve to have one, I didn't even make it to the gym this week."

This was her ego talking. So I suggested this approach: Initial reaction - Gratitude.

Sign from House of Belonging on Etsy

Ok so the cupcakes are there. Immediate reaction - thank the person that brought them. Thank them personally, write an email, in your mind, whatever.

"Wow that was so nice and thoughtful of them to think of me today. And how thoughtful to lug these across town, probably in a cab, going out of their way into work today just for me.  I feel so loved."

As soon as you begin to do this more often, the ego will quiet. It won't even have a chance to say "You don't deserve it."

How to Practice an Attitude of Gratitude

Here are a few ways you can begin to cultivate your attitude of gratitude this week.

1. Every night this week, keep a gratitude journal.
This can be a physical journal, in the notepad on your phone, or just something you think about before you fall asleep. Think of three things you are thankful for - it can be as simple as the super comfortable pillow your head is lying on. Write them down, or recite them.

2. When dealing with a situation that brings fear/anxiety/stress, thank those involved. Notice if the fear dissipates.

3. If you catch yourself wanting to react to someone with attitude, pause - put yourself in their shoes, and then genuinely thank them. 
The more often we practice this attitude of being thankful, the more you will see it start to play out in your daily life. So give it a try for the next week - and see how you feel.

Check back in again next Monday for our next topic in #FGKMindfulMay! And if you have any questions, feel free to comment below.

With gratitude,
Follow me on Bloglovin!

I am so excited to announce a new series for this month, which I have named "FGK Mindful May" or #FGKMindfulMay.

What is Mindful May?

Each week, starting Monday, I will announce a new theme or challenge for the week. These all circulate around taking a more mindful approach to your everyday life.

I was very enlightened during my teacher training in our "off the mat" discussions. We discussed many ways of making simple changes or thinking about things in a new way that have really made an impact on my interactions with myself and with others since I have been back. I am so excited to share some of these with you (and because I am far from perfect, it will help me too!).

How to Participate

Just check in with the FGK Facebook page or FGK Instagram on Monday mornings to see that week's challenge. I will include a longer description on the blog of our focus for the week.

I will also include some way you can "complete" that weeks challenge, using hashtag #fgkmindfulmay in a photo you post on instagram or Facebook.

My goal is to cultivate a community sense of mindfulness, gratitude and to see how this begins to impact your life and the lives of others around you.

Spread the love! 

Check back in Monday for the first Mindful May challenge and enjoy your weekend!

Heart open,

 Follow me on Bloglovin!